Reverse Engineer Your Strengths

Maybe you’ve heard the adage, “If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.”

Most of us are a lot like that proverbial hammer. We use a limited number of our available strengths most of the time, and when we hit resistance, we double down. While finding a set of “go-to” strengths that work for you is normal, it’s not the most effective relational strategy.

The challenge is that not everyone responds to our strengths in the same way. People have different motivations and perspectives, which shape how they interpret our actions. If we rely on our strengths without considering the other person or the situation, we may unintentionally create distance instead of connection—even when our intentions are good. True relational effectiveness comes from understanding both our own strengths and how they impact those around us.

There is another way. We can learn the connection between motivations and strengths, and choose our use of strengths adaptively instead of automatically. When we know more about what motivates us and others, we can choose from a broader range of options to tone down, balance out, or replace strengths to be most effective with different people and contexts.

This approach is akin to “reverse engineering,” where we start with the context and think backward to discover what best suits a particular person or outcome. This can be done with another person (a family member or teammate), a cohort (a small group or ministry team), or a group (a church or a customer base). For example, if a ministry team starts by identifying the top strengths that would make the team most effective, each team member could find authentic ways to use the wisdom of relational intelligence to lean into those strengths to make the team more effective.

Consentia Group uses the Strength Deployment Inventory 2.0 (SDI) coupled with gospel-based soul development to empower ministry leaders and coaches to harness the power of relational intelligence. We teach you how to identify the unique motivational values system of each person on your team and how to harness the adaptive use of strengths to maximize effectiveness and resolve conflict.

Click below to learn more about our cutting-edge relational intelligence certifications or tap into one of our training programs in your context:

Harness the Power of Relational Intelligence